'Marry the nerds and the good guys' - this is the relationship advice given by Sheryl Sandberg, COO at Facebook. Sheryl says that if you want to excel in your career it's vital to pick a partner who views you as an equal and wants the same things as you. This is heavily reflected in numerous interviews with Sheryl and her late husband, Dave Goldberg, who frequently discussed their 'peer marriage' (a pre-agreed plan centred around a shared responsibility for earning money, childcare, household chores, recreational time etc).
How do you establish this early on? ASK THE QUESTION.
"You ask and you ask early and you are not afraid of offending," she said. "If they're going to be offended ... you don't want to date them."
As awkward as it might be on a first date, you're never going to know what someone really wants unless you ask and sometimes, leaving it to chance can have catastrophic consequences further down the line.
When you get to your late 20's, you probably aren't dating people for the same reasons you dated people in your early 20's. Generally, you want different things post-25. A meaningful, long-term relationship. As per social media it seems that most couples tend to bite the bullet and start getting engaged from around 27 onwards. Even though I fear that social pressures/partner pressures are responsible for this, you don't want to waste your time messing around with idiots when you could be finding your soulmate. If you're not into marriage, think about this as your life partner. Combining a career with a relationship can, at times, be challenging. Say you're an Investment Banker, early in your career where you're literally working around the clock. It is so important that you choose a partner who can support you in this and has the same ideals and work ethic as you do. It is the only way a relationship could survive in that scenario.
What's your experience of relationships versus careers? Check out the rest of the article on Sheryl here on the Business Insider:
When a Financial Times reporter asked Sandberg what she should be looking for in a relationship, the executive had a brilliant response. "The guys who want an equal relationship," she said. "Guys who want to support your career. You have a great career." Pressed by the reporter who was eager to know how to find these men, who Sandberg called "the good guys," the exec offered a simple but effective nugget of wisdom: Ask them. That's right. When you go on a date, be upfront, and ask the person if he is one of these "good guys" who wants an equal relationship and will support you in your career.